Establishing himself as Conan‘s favorite stand-up comedian with repeated bookings to perform stand-up, Daniel Sloss was back onstage and on TV again Monday night, this time noting that even though he’s a foreigner, he pays more taxes to the U.S. than our current president does. If you think that’s something, you should know the deeper, darker, outright evil thoughts Sloss entertains. One of which involves a child losing ice cream. It’s one thing if you’re a young Eddie Murphy. If you’re an adult, though?

Roll the clip.

You can hear more of the real Daniel Sloss in Episode #60 of my podcast series, Last Things First.