Before you begin listening to Louis Katz’s CD, “If These Balls Could Talk,” it’s important that you know a couple of things. Dave Attell is a fan of his (often bringing Katz on the road with him as his feature act, and employing him on his Showtime series, Dave’s Old Porn). And like Attell, Katz likes dirty jokes. As he says in his opening track, so far in his life, his “proudest achievement was a three-way with two chubby chicks” and calls it a “menage a ugh.”
If sex is on a man’s mind every 20 seconds, it’s in Katz’s material about as often. But just because the jokes are dirty, that doesn’t mean they’re street jokes. Katz is not only very personal about his sex life, but also smart and colorful about it. One early joke about wearing glasses during sex has him arguing that without them, he’d be trying to have sex with an Impressionist painting. He also worked up a series of metaphors to describe how gay heterosexual marriage actually is. Eleven tracks in, after comparing his penis to Ellis Island, he warns an audience member: “It’s going to get worse.” Then adds: “That’s my grandma’s favorite joke.” One of his “Weird Sex Moves” involves time travel. By track 23 of 25, he opens with an apology: “I’m sorry. I talk about sex so much in my act. Did you know that even the salad joke ended up being about sex. What the fuck’s wrong with me?”
But it’s not all about sex. Food and health is on his mind quite a bit, too, and he takes on vegans, pescatarians, cigarette smoking, the priciness of healthy food, and the time he lived with a hippie. That story has been animated for your listening and viewing pleasure. Roll it!
In the end, however, Katz has returned to sex. In a wise move, he closes with a bit about how insecure we are even talking about sex with the words that we use to describe it. If you’re not insecure about sex, you’ll find that most of his act is filled with such wisdom.
Want to read up on Katz? I showcased Louis Katz back in March in my Meet Me in New York series.
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