I don't know what you were doing out late on Friday night, because I'm not your mother and you didn't update your Facebook and Twitter status to check in with me on Foursquare. But I do know that if you had stayed in and tuned in Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, you would have enjoyed it as Craigy Ferg welcomed both Billy Connolly and "the adorable and hilarious" Maria Bamford to his late-night story time.

Here is the Bammer's set from that show — now with pink hair! — in which she notes that the holidays remind her that she's not real big on relationships right about now. Also, if you want to see why Maria Bamford doesn't want to get botox, watch all the way to the end. I know. You already were going to watch the whole thing. So what are you waiting for? Roll it!