Hari Kondabolu‘s stand-up theme on Monday night’s Conan was colonialism, which meant that he delivered it in English — even though the waiter spoke in Chinese, when we all know that you’re supposed to do in Rome what the Romans do. But what would Adam and Steve do? A lot of questions to cover here, and it’ll help if you’re more of a chess person than a checkers person if you want all the answers you’re seeking.

King me!