Zach Sherwin’s hip-hop ballet tribute to Sully’s Miracle on the Hudson: “Goose MCs”

On Jan. 15, 2009, US Airways Flight 1549 departed New York City’s LaGuardia Airport bound for Charlotte and then onto Seattle. The plane struck a gaggle of Canadian geese shortly after takeoff, lost power, and crash-landed on the Hudson River. Or, as we all know, didn’t so much crash. Thanks to Capt. Chesley “Sully” Sullenberger.

Since then, Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis danced the Black Swan together and made out for Oscar, but made no mention of Sully.

Zach Sherwin has rectified this oversight.

The comedian has unveiled a new tribute to Sully upon the fifth anniversary of the “Miracle on the Hudson” via this rap and choreographed ballet with the LOFT Ensemble Theater (dancers Seth Belliston as Capt. Chesley “Sully” Sullenberger, Evan Swenson as the Swan, and AJ Abrams, Ashley Frances Hoffman, Stephanie Kim as the Geese). The song is called “Goose MCs.”

Here are Sherwin’s lyrics to wrap your head around before you rap your mouth along with him. Check it:

[spoken] Captain Chesley Sullenberger. On January 15, 2009, he landed his aircraft safely in the Hudson River in New York City after his engines were disabled by a flock of birds And sometimes, with all the jealous haters trying to bring me down, I feel like the Chesley Sullenberger of this rap game.

Goose MCs, all up in my engines
Don’t make me land this plane in the Hudson
They got nasty intentions
I got goose MCs in my engines
I got goose MCs, all up in my engines
Tryin’ to cause some malfunctions
But I’m the Captain Chesley Sullenberger of this rap game,
For these goose MCs

They call him Captain Sully,
Fast actin’, rapidly adaptin’ Sully
And when life blew a fanload of crap at Sully,
He did what he had to to make it happen. Sully! Uh!
And if the birds never would have tried to murder him,
I’m sure you and I never would have heard of him
But now the man has got icon status,
From dicing up geese, like a daikon radish…
He’s got fame, he’s got his cash stacked higher
Don’t you get it geese? Your plan backfired!
You didn’t kill him, you made him stronger!
Yeah, you flew up in his engine,
But he slayed and conquered
And if you think I’m any different, I think you’re dead meat
I will shred you from beaks to wings to webbed feet
Hear the words coming out of my mouth:
Stay up out my engines, goose! Fly south!

Goose MCs, all up in my engines
They wanna bring me down for crash landings
But they’ll only bring me national media attention, yo,
I got geese in my engines
I got goose MC’s in my engines
They want unhappy endings
But I’m the Captain Chesley Sullenberger of this rap game
And you’re a goose MC

Let me tell ya bout the goose MCs
They’re some pathetic excuse MCs
Try to bring me down but no use, MCs
I suggest you vamoose MCs
This is a war with no truce, MCs
King of the gods, I am Zeus, MCs!
And in Greek mythology,
Zeus used to transform himself into an ass-kicking swan….

Don’t make me swan up on you goose rappers!
Swan up! Swan up, don’t make me swan up!
Swan up! Swan up! Swan up, don’t make me swan up!
I am the Captain Chesley Sullenberger of this rap game,
Don’t make me swan up!
Geese! Do you not understand me?
In your language: honk honk honk, don’t make me swan up!

Goose MCs, all up in my engines!
Whoa! Don’t make me swan up!
I got Canadian avians all up in my engines,
Don’t make me swan up!
I got beef with these goose rappers….
You know it makes me so angry…
I got angry beef….
It’s like a sullen burger…
For these goose MCs.

Sean L. McCarthy

Editor and publisher since 2007, when he was named New York's Funniest Reporter. Former newspaper reporter at the New York Daily News, Boston Herald and smaller dailies and community papers across America. Loves comedy so much he founded this site.

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