If you go by what the Internets were saying in real-time overnight, then last night's Saturday Night Live was a stinker. Of course, this all happens the one week I decide go to Los Angeles and don't park myself in front of a television. They know I'll still find out what happens on SNL, right? I'm still not sure exactly what happened when January Jones hosted with musical guest Black Eyed Peas, nor when, but I do know that these videos have shown up on the Internets. And the video evidence tells a slightly different story, unless I find out that these videos are from dress rehearsal, or that the real stinkfest came from the Black Eyed Peas, and not from the show itself. Suspense! While we wait for the truth to set us free, let's take a look at the evidence before us…
We're seeing less and less of Fred Armisen's Barack Obama impersonation, and tonight's show opened with Jason Sudeikis' Joe Biden instead, taking over the White House since President Obama headed to Asia on a diplomatic trip. Biden is supposed to be crazy honest, but was this version crazy honest funny?
January Jones has trouble reading off of her cue cards during her opening monologue. Sudeikis, Armisen and Bill Hadar play superfans of Mad Men called Mad Mennies. It's like that sketch from the 1980s when William Shatner took on the Trekkies, only not so much. Bonus points, though, for having Armisen pick Peggy (played by his real-life newlywed wife, Elisabeth Moss, over Jones' Betty Draper). Do we subtract points, however, for Sudeikis calling Betty Betsy? Oh, double bonus points for Abby Elliott as Joan Holloway (though subtract a point, perhaps, for making us think for a second that Christina Hendricks might've been making that cameo?). Math is hard. TWSS.
What else? Did you say you wanted fart jokes? Fart jokes? We got those…
I present the rest of these videos out of chronological order for now, as I am not near my TV and won't be for a while.
Here's a play off of the classic Alfred Hitchcock movie Rear Window, with Sudeikis playing Jimmy Stewart, Jones as Grace Kelly, and Bobby Moynihan as Hitchcock. Or is he really playing Lorne Michaels??? Hard to say, people. Hard. To. Say. That's not the point of this sketch, though. Point is, Grace isn't quite so graceful when she's got a case of the toots. Fart!
More scenes with Jones and Sudeikis? OK. Here they are on a date. Supposedly a first date, and yet Jones already is kissy-kissy, and Sudeikis has taken her cloud gazing. She doesn't quite know how to play along. Oh, I get it. She's a pretty dumb blonde. Also, she's older than we are, based on her pop culture references?! That part went unexplained. What's the formula to determine how pretty a girl can be to offset how dumb she is, divided by the man's horniness? Math is still hard, people. TWSS times two.
This is another scene with Sudeikis and Jones, with Kristen Wiig as the focal point in a return of her TV reporter character, Michelle Dison, who gets a bit too hot under her collar while interviewing people out in the field. This time, Wiig interviews a Dairy Queen employee (Jones) who foiled a robbery, but spends too much time uttering creepy thoughts about wanting to get with Jones. The sketch runs too long in this form, but Wiig gets out a couple of really funny lines, making it worthwhile. "Let's face each other in the dark!"
I miss Michaela Watkins. We all do, and we should. She is great. And bringing back sketches that Watkins was great in only underscore how weird it was for her to be gone all too quickly. I say this despite loving Jenny Slate, who plays Hoda Kotb now against Wiig's Kathie Lee Gifford. Slate's perfectly fine as Kotb. That's not my problem. My problem is that without the chemistry Watkins displayed with Wiig, we're left with Wiig getting pummeled by the Black Eyed Peas. Boom boom pow!? Spoiler alert? Wait. Did Wiig's KLG say she washes the "D&Bs" on live TV? Jones, meanwhile, played an animal trainer who wondered what camera she should be talking to.
Bill Hader played Dr. Jekyll with Jones as his wife in a sketch, revealing his secret double identity as Mr. Hyde to his colleagues. In yet another SNL flight of homosexual fancy, this sketch idea finds Jekyll blaming all of his same-sex dalliances on Hyde. Colleagues played by Moynihan, Sudeikis and Will Forte are incredulous. Incredulous, I say! Armisen plays "Hyde's" lover, Julius. Um, OK…
Weekend Update featured the return of Bon Jovi opposite band Jon Bovi, played by Forte and Sudeikis. This is a ridiculous idea that almost always works. Is it because Forte seems like he's channeling Animal from The Muppets? Maybe. It could also have something to do with Sudeikis having a grand retort to the challenge of eating his mustache.
Darrell Hammond returned to the scene last night, playing the role of Lou Dobbs, who had to explain his sudden departure this week from CNN. Tag team, back again.
And here was Kim Kardashian, played by the tiny and adorable Nasim Pedrad. Look at her butt. She wants you to look at her butt.
SNL did have an SNL Digital Short last night. Andy Samberg is a tough roommate to share a bathroom with, especially since he seems to always be sitting on the toilet with his pants down. Always. Sorry, Fred! Nasim Pedrad makes a cameo. I cannot relate to this short, because I never go number two. I'm a lady. GET OUT!
And for a party planning guide from yesteryear (but not Mad Men's yesteryear), Marjorie Pettibone (Jones) presents "A Lady's Guide to Throwing A Party." Appearances by Hader, Wiig, Elliott, Armisen, Samberg, Slate, Forte. That looked like some party, eh? Don't forget the shock therapy! This clip is brought to you by the year 1952. Ah, memories.
What sketches from last night aren't online yet but should be? Did I miss some greatness or train wreckiness? Was Kenan Thompson on vacation this week? Let me know in the comments and I'll do some digging!