If you read this site, then you’re probably more than well aware of Myq Kaplan and his love of turning words and phrases into funny fun times. But until Friday night, you hadn’t been able to see him perform on Late Show with David Letterman.

Situation remedied.

Kaplan slowed his roll for the audience inside the Ed Sullivan Theatre. Or did he slow his role? Someone look into that for me. In the meantime, please enjoy this performance by our man Myq, in which he pokes holes in the flaws of the “needle in a haystack” argument (poking holes in haystack is rather easy, as it turns out), as well as how books beget movie-books, the power of magnets, and how gay parents are usually better than straight ones. Don’t worry, folks. He’s figured this all out. Roll the clip!