Nate Bargatze had gotten bumped recently from Conan when the other segments ran long. This week, they brought him back and had him tape his stand-up comedy in advance, and made sure to fit it into the program last night.

Among other things, you’ll learn how to deal with marriage, as Bargatze has been married for five years and has some lessons to share with you. Such as: What to do when she asks if you’ll take a bullet for her, and how to reason with her via text message at all hours of the night (note: this latter point only really applies to stand-up comedians). Enjoy!

P.S. Very timely message from Conan O’Brien in the intro, eh?