Piranha_3D Everybody remember Snakes on a Plane? OK. Let me rephrase that: Anybody remember anything about Snakes on a Plane other than the one line you remember Samuel L. Jackson uttering about being fed up with all of the mother-loving snakes? I remember sitting in a sold-out cinema in Boston with a crowd of crazies at midnight when the film opened, and I wrote up a blow-by-blow cheat sheet viewing guide for Snakes on a Plane. Those were days.

Well, today is the day for Piranha 3D to rewrite that cinematical history book, and one of its stars, comedian Paul Scheer, was nice enough to write up a few rules to help you enjoy watching the carnage in all of its dimensions. I'll let Scheer take it from here:

I'm pretty sure he means all of this, except maybe that last eighth rule. You can skip that one. And if you're watching the movie in NYC, you also can heighten the tension by imagining that every little bite is actually from a bedbug. Because it just might be bedbugs! Ack!